Best Parts about being Single

• Not having to shave
• Watching whatever the fuck I want 
• Going to bed whenever the fuck I want
• No bitching
• Not worrying about someone else's happiness
• Not worrying about someone else fucking up
• Eating whatever the fuck I want
• Talking to my cats, because fuck you
• Licking the plate
• Farting
• Tweezing my eyebrows on the couch
• Eating cheese on the couch while wearing a snuggy (thx Liz Lemon!)
• Impromptu hang outs with friends
• No bitching
• Time to study and learn and read 
• Eating olives directly out of the jar
• Total A/C control
• Making out with random strangers, because why not?
• Taking up the ENTIRE bed and covers
• No bitching
• It's just EASIER!